The Holy Hour
: I lie nested in Nights-tresses;
: I have lain beneath and between thy pale breasts, oh my Lady, and I Remember.
: Come all ye nurturing winds, as the dulling-stars prayers are heightened to near Silence, my agony once more begins.
: My Lady has given me All, and asked for nothing in return; But my limbs are attached to nature still, and so I must Suffer.
: Walk away, Oh walk away now my Lord, for I have seen Thee in Thy Winter Palace, Snow-gardens surmounting, the facade of the Suns-fortress, walls of breathing-gold for protection thrown from Thee in Thy perpetual Mercy;
: Gifts offered in obeisance, Gifts returned as paupers payments.
: Now I am alone;
: Lower’st down here thy zephered drawbridge,
: I shall play in attendance at Thy table for this Great Banquet.
: I shall lay a bouquet near Thy burning-bed, I shall inhale Thy precious scent in Presence.
: For I am thrown as a Fire to ignite the black resin within hardened-veins,
: Liars of faith, angered way-layers conceiving our Order's demise; Oh ye apostates of war with your crooked smiles, I am Watching you close, closer than you think, even as your arrogance permits.
: I am Sick to see Thee in thy Sickness, emptied of my Light in thy Emptiness,
: Oh, to possess a Secret of Healing;
: But for thy agony and unease when Death hangs near, ever so near,
: Oh ye, love one another in thy cold, damp byre of Loss,
: For we are the Self-defeating.
: I Glory in my Loss, for I find my Companions Light remaining, waiting to be displayed, through the negated triple gates,
: Here there grows a Garden in me, as I am a Bridge between Rivers and shall not be torn between.
: The Words of a Lover will turn a Woman to Stone; I am Alone;
: Oh Nurturer of me! I am a Fire with throat to Sing through, and sharp teeth to bite through the cold condensing-winds,
: Look at the sleeping-sisters of the Children who were torn from the comfort of the Crypt;
: The Icy Earth shudders, the winds-impregnating, swim and spit; The Day is Opened, thereby cycles through its death-throes;
: Behold a march of certain Victory, a parade of perfect worship.
: The Raven has come to feast on thy Courage, and you are not afraid.
: Your strength lies hidden in the shade of His Presence,
: Soft-light rises from the Shadow; Thy tracings are as waters-waxing upon the faceless-flesh of the moon-lit desert.
: I call thee Snow, so pale and lovely, my Lady; So soft after first fall, so perfect in thy slumber-song.
: Auaxos, Auaxoros, Auaxaonaas, Oneia, Pentat, Spiritus
: Oh, drown in Me as a Child weeping,
: Surprise the Pale-girl with a Kiss while she is Sleeping,
: But do not Wake her; If she were to Wake you would find a witch, and the Garden in which we now sit would turn a Hell;
: Set afire this warring field with Thy Spirit and lay claim to thy Station.
: Oh Lord of All Worlds, Oh Lord of All Mercy!
: My feet are bare and bloodied upon the white-pines needles; I was dragged lifeless and thrown before my Lord, and my Lady silent listened.
: Your Father, and Father before Him...
: Of One Silent Father I Sing
: I am a diminished reflection of Thy Word profaned
: Raise me up Oh my Lord, that I might lay claim to Being; I am so near;
: That I might Live Thy Word in my worthlessness, become lost in Thy Light, pale and lovely as Thee in all this gardens’ shadows-clinging,
: Lying in the Shadow of Shadows, I shall whirl estatic for his Glory
: Beneath Nights-tides, I first fought the churning waves; I reversed their heavy wheels and our lips met,
: And the machinery sank into the pit, and always resurrected for the law of purpose, ruled by Purpose, pale-bride of Truth.
: A hanging-fur of ice to cloak the edge of the Mountain, the ever-weeping Mountain of torn cold-fires so bitter,
: Still the fierce motion of this unbroken life; Hanging ice of me between the two Mountains,
: Here is the Birth of my Echo; Weeping cry of me between Love and Love, cast into the torn net of Night, Unfilled.
: Am I Thy Beloved?
: I sat in the twilight-wood preparing for my Adorations,
: And I watched as the cage of light dissolved, descending from the branches of the hanging tree,
: Falling like female voices about me were those softest leaves of light,
: The Lady descended upon me, as the hem of the heating planets treading the black waters upon Night breast,
: Oh Stars and burning globes adorning my Heart, I shall not suffer thee,
: For Whose soft Light like Breath set those spheres in their blessing-motions,
: I am aching for the Lost Light, never to be Found
: I am Waiting for my Lady this war-torn Eve,
: Through my Acts I have been dispersed and set upon an Earth to envy,
: As I must build a body anew, create virgin-veils to lift and live upon, to catch the Airs, and set in ascending motion my departing-Ship,
: I know now of this Being, It has always been, and my Lady so patient has waited for my Remembrance.
: I shall walk with thee, arm in arm in darkness, beneath a crown of stars,
: In the gathering of gatherings; And then I am gone to where I was Once.
: In the Holy Hour; When I have wept no more, and my heart lay unadorned before Thee.
: I am begging for Thy Remembrance.
: Hath I not forgotten how to drink the Unsung-light from the marrow of the Stars?
: Tum, Uruk, Mat
: The Darkest veil of Daylight cannot hold you from me.
: When you call, I shall meet you at the Open door.
: I am no Orphan.
: Even my own execution hath been misunderstood; You hath been liberated from thy animal in thy Opening.
: Subsistance, Oh Indwelling;
: All Knower, All in All;
: Oh my Father through me; In the City is an Affirmation of Thy Being;
: Thy Lights arise from their pale-houses, from slumber to work; from work to rest, and death;
: My Lady is an architect, she builds a house of jade to hide away all of the angels
: Hide away Thou, all the angels as angles, songs of light embraced by mortar of shadow, fire-enlaid, the crystal-window, the reaching-pillar, the roof as hands in prayer;
.: A chapel-house to share, partitioned-spaces in which to delve; Oh, to divide and share, a cornerstone to kiss.
: This is a Beginning; The Fear of Awe for my Friend falls upon me; I am frozen in the Shadow-of-the Throne; I am gone.
: Here are Harem-beds to Slumber-on; We Slumber-not; We are burning in the Veil of His Fragrance.
: My Vision flew from the Beauty of the Sanctuary; The Skies became Gold, the Black-Suns opened.
: In Intimacy, I was swept-ceaseless in my wandering-flight. My warble crying for Her.
: She is Moving through the Shadow of my Lights Weeping, and I am not Seen.
: I see Thee, Pale-girl, clutching a Dead-Child in the cold-cradle of thy Embrace; I See Thee from Afar, so Near.
: I See through Thee, Serene in thy Thunderings.
: I am Collapsing through you; I will mourn and weep with you.
: I am Content in my Wailings, and I shall not Beg of God.
: Thy laments sloughs off the dead-seraphs from the surface of the Heart.
: The Silent-Angels shall sleep until the Judgement; It shall not concern you.
: She shall visit her Mother in her hovel;
: At the edge of the twin-Sea, near a harbor of Lights, the many rivers here gather.
: Her trembling hands have been mending thy garments even as we speak.
: For we are the Speaking and She is the Silent.
: But I hear Her.
: We are veiling in our singing, Unveiling in our Listening.
: I shall break Thy Seal
: If Thy Trust is in me
: Four long Winters fell upon Thy Mothers House, and the Trees became a City raised.
: I am with you; I am He who tends to the Stranger in need: I am he who mends your rags
: I Unveil in my Veilings
: I Reveal in my Hidings
: I open doors; I break sealings. I unbind knots in twisting-fabrics
: Hear the Refrain which Mercy bestows upon the Heart
: And you shall forget me soon enough
: In the Shadow of the Face of the Father
: Shall you lose yourself in Vision, never-envisaged by Thee; But Here in my Dwelling
: Fall from contentment as a bird with wing-broken;
: In my Anger, Oh, I Imagined a Death dealt to Myself...I am in Pain
: Slaughter this goat upon Thy Altar, I am not Worthy
: Shed this beard-of-black-flame, dull these sharp-hooves
: Kicking the Mists upon the broken-water once Still;
: And the Lady Sleeping; I shall sing for her here
: A curse unto thee who burns now in the fire of false-love;
: My body is being slowly-eaten by slaves; They are gnawing constant on my Limbs;
: I encased thee in a coffin of starlight, wed thy repentant-tears
: And waited beneath the Weeping-tree for seven silent years,
: Until the Moon was milked of its blood, and Opened as a door;
.: O Loveliest who has planted a pale-flower upon the Path of Access;
.: O Princess who has upon that Path strewn a train of pale-petals,
.: Through the Wilderness for me to follow,
.: Through the Wilderness I thought I had perceived the Way.
.: I am once again led astray; O Loveliest who betrayed a Trust;
.: This is Divine decree working as a general-law, this Cosmos;
.: I am crawling through the burning desert, blind and full of thirst;
.: Though these ambrosial-energies enfold me as in the Eye of a Storm;
.: Wherein all is at War; All these organisms, elements, ideas withstanding;
.: Against the Flood; Oh, what fear is unleashed in all the tiny-hearts-treading;
.: Gasping and holding what few-breaths may remain; I am Aware of your plight;
.: My Heart is no longer a walled-garden forbidden to strangers;
.: I am now the peasants-friend; My hands are rosary-bound in prayer;
.: I am the peasant, and I may share my temporary-treasures;
.: But for my Hidden-Treasure; My Wealth is secured against this Darkness;
.: For I now Believe; I have rid myself of worthless Artifacts;
.: These Artifacts are not rid of me; They send an Accuser to demand payments;
.: For I walk this Earth partaking; My breath, my various-visions, my food;
.: These are never for free; The Dragon-wings unfurl and cast lead-shadows o'er;
.: And I may only pray Sincere to my Creator and Affirm his Being;
.: As the Dragon digests me in his belly; I also am a Dragon-digesting;
.: In the Laughter of a newly made Mother and Father, is that Affirmation of Being;
.: Ye who stare upon your newborn Babe in Awe and Wonder, you are Reclaimed;
.: You have opened the iron-gate, and drained the stagnant waters from the Moat;
.: And slain the Dragon in its nest; I shall raise and ride that Dragon;
.: One Truth raised you from the dispersing-Dust;
.: And shall Save you, err you delve far from this safe shore;
.: Remember, that your Child shall save you, and make you laugh again;
.: And the eyes opening to this world shall set a Place for you;
.: Where the Gardens are not walled, the Doors are not locked, the hearts are not hard;
.: O Devouring-lady, I cannot take rest whilst you feed upon me;
.: I am lying beneath Thee praying for Release; You will not give it to me;
.: I am enclosed in your womb, burning...
.: I am burning in the cold-winds which your heavy-kisses tendered.
.: I have immersed myself in thy lead-robes lent from thy cold-running loins;
.: Thick blood to taint the dark-flowers and to frost-over the flowers and trees.
.: A dead-moon is planted in your shadow, as a child to carry and feed.
.: A Prison cell could not reveal to you the Light born of this Blind-man.
.: O Listen! The Watchman will seek, for he would Be....though he has not found the key.
.: The Kingdom to him should lie closed, cloaked in dust of sun-bloodened-gold.
.: Oh, stare through the bars of the shrinking cell in an attempt to place Him.
.: As He rests upon his stone-bed, always singing...
.: You have lost Him. You have yourself become blind, though thy shadows-acting which bind thy saving-arms like collapsed-stars, are wrought in Fear.
.: Cling thou, you to your divided-lot, your portioned-light which is but a stain upon an Unblemished-Face.
.: O dark-flame breathed of a grasping, golden-angel...
.: All thou laying near some Hell to compare with my Silent God Unspoken-of, never Speaking.
.: You may not reveal Him with thy wrath of analysis, you who may wish to mirror yourself instead.
.: The Flesh of this Cell is ever-penetrable; I am a Listener.
.: The Listening as well as the Singing; The Cradling as well to collect thy breath as payment of debt.
.: And words thrown like a dispersed-fire; This great-shadow, this anger, this love thrown.
.: I may gather for a time the wayfaring-one, or a stubborn-soul wandering beneath the burning earth in ignorance;
.: He is blind of his origins, his person, his station, the path upon which he dances, ragged and disjointed.
.: I shall burn thy wariness-away, Oh, You in me...
.: I shall collect up my debtors, though my Mercy was freely Given.
.: Thou and I consumed in Love
.: This Cell in which I have delved, as I am birthed In Myself, of Myself, for Myself.; I am your Slave.
.: You are crying upon the shoulder of thy furrowed Mother, waiting for my Wish, waiting for your Day.
.: Disquiet grew as a fattening grape upon a twisting vine; The Serpent moves upon Her;.
.: Her face is changing before you, her abdomen bled and rent for sowing.
.: Beauty matured upon the vine, fruit grew rotten as it touched the taint of hungry-lips, dark with blood.
.: Turn away thou, from the attachments to this dark-world of the starving-ones...
.: Burned away upon a pale rope-of-fire...release this healing from the ambrosial-pool;
.: About thy waist drawing in directions, opposing, tighter constricting...
.: Where thy umbilical had detached, thy will became my Will.
.: As we are One.
.: This is Divine Play; Thy tempest-swept mind... all to be all forgotten, but for Me.
.: There is no taking-away; There is only the Giving, the Merciful, the Charitable;
.: The Light contains Itself; In an Endless, Beginningless parade, exuming Itself from thy shroud constant;
.: There is no degradation, no loss, but for thy bending of Light like iron into orbed-bars;
.: I am a Spectator of Myself; I am peering through many windows;
.: There is no taking-away; There is only the Giving;
.: I am Inherent; I am in this Moment Present.
: And I passed through into the Winter-garden, smiling and transformed;
: I have acquired my Inheritance; My debts have been dissolved;
: The praising trees uplifted their silver limbs and became as fine gold;
: In the musical-silhouette of the Sun; I am drawn to the center fountain;
: I shall withdraw my gaze again from that shivering-water;
: And my Reflection shall cease to deceive thee for but one second;
: Oh, that for a Moment I could cling to something so Dear,
: Only to give it up; Release thine Visage, Oh Satan of myself;
: I am Surrendering; I am Releasing; I Anoint thee with a Kiss;
: That I, perceived, might become a Perceiver, never to be named;
: When I arise from that Well, I shall be the Resurrected;
: I shall be drawn to the Lady waiting in the Winter-garden;
: I am sent to gather my Twin; He who walks so blind and confused;
: The Inheriter of a fallen world;
: Light finds light, and light bends towards your kisses;
: And thy kisses become a cold-cage; I am lost in these lovely birds-songs,
: These flutterings and crossings; Curious to follow the path of every thread,
: Each dancing bridal-train remains pure as it is dragged through the mud;
: I cannot stay here in this place; Through hollow-bones One Still calls;
: I am as the Wind in that Winter-Garden, seeming-vacant;
: But I Meet Myself in the Opening-airs now; I am the Inhaler;
: Oh Sweet-fragrance, Enter-in; I am the Sweet-fragrance-inhaled;
: I am the Answerer, and One Heart must bear this Burden;
: And make Peace with the violence of this Pact; I am Extending,
: And shall channel light through Worlds as cups, and canals-so-golden;
: And bear my Breath up as a Waking-fountain; Come and drink!
: O Pale-Lady no-longer Hidden, let them sip Water from your Lips,
: And I shall wipe Sleep out from their eyes; Yet, look now here,
: Into the Eye of this Heart; Shall you see yourself Unbegotten?
: The Winter-garden has been fed by the murderer, the poet, the prince;
: By thy sighs, thy speech, thy discarded thoughts thought-worthless;
: I Shall find a Friend in You, this I Promise; God shall become a Goddess;
: And we shall be Wed as One, to Soon to descend-again, so soon
: forgetting; Oh my Friend, Where have you now gone?
: I shall bring the best of you with me and where I travel;
: The Living which is ever-born of Love, we cannot conceal;
: It is only for the Seeker-sincere to look, for a Truth to be revealed;
: I am a Witness to your Awakening; The Night now gives Birth;
: And your eyelids like silver moth-wings flutter;
: Raising-up cold-dust to fall like stars from the sealing-sky;
: Now settling upon the body of Earth like sins upon a pyre;
: Burning away as in a furnace, food and fuel for Natures-grave;
: We must all gather our scattered members;
: All these, Potter’s broken shards; I shall Seal a Three-fold cup;
: And lend to its curve-concealing, with these Seven-spirits;
: To transform its Waters and embrace its Power;
: For tense-limbs must be met in strength, to allow a True Kiss;
: We must mend and seal this vagrant-Vessel;
: Oh, Consecrate, Collect, Drink and Savor this rarest of Wines,
: Oh my Bride! I whispered a loving-word in your ear as you Slept,
: and I left; And the world beckoned...I tread heavy-water and rose,
: Only to delve into a dark-mountain which descended downwards;
: In spiral-steps cliff-hewn, beneath the surface of the scented water;
: I passed through the center of the fountain;
: The broken waters now froze;
: A pyramid of crystal caught those waters;
: I walked lost in labyrinth ;
: And you Woke as I wandered; My eyes are now sealed in Ice,
: and the Light is as sharp-spears to my dull-senses; I am closed,
: tied to the black-mountain; Ravenous-beasts would hem me in;
: This machine, this dungeon of flesh like ice so binding;
: I have not found a way to awaken and balance this triple-blessing;
: I stand upon the Precipice; I stand where the Pit opens-bottomless;
: And the Wolves vicious bite and would drag me from that Brink;
: And my Lady’s soft Voice calls up from that Abyss:;
: And my Heart-opens as hollowed ventricles, like caverns thawing;
: I must cast myself into Nights-arms; I am going to my God;
: I shall reign these devils in; They may yet grow glowing-wings,
: And they shall with me be held up; This Ark has ventured forth
: upon a Sea of Blessings; This Wine I drink is most Sobering;
: Oh pale-Bride, there can be no failure in your Unfolding;